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Sexy Over 50 | Revitalize Your Mojo With Melinda Lee

Melinda Lee has a goal; to support female baby boomers get ready for love again! In her Sexy Over 50 books and on this site, women explore the topic of preparing themselves for love...Lee offers help via tips from on-line dating to anti-aging to sexual energy to mojo activation and head-to-toe-inside-out make-overs and how important all these factors are to attracting the right partner. Lee suggests boomer women begin by incorporating one or all of the Sexy Over 50 mojo activators. Within weeks Sexy Over 50 devotees see their lives change. Starting at age 40, then, 50, 60 and beyond Melinda found women complain about attracting men....and, that's why Lee founded Sexy Over 50. Lee's philosophy is that successfully dating and feeling sexy is a state of mind...so whether you are single and looking to begin dating again, wanting to wear sexy lingerie and feel sexy doing it, or, have a desire to simply feel young again Melinda Lee's Sexy Over 50 movement may just inspire you to take action to have more!

To get maximum benefit...progress with the Sexy Over 50 series, subscribe to the Mojo Blog, sign in for the free exclusive video and watch the Sexy Over 50 videos in our Video Gallery...you’ll find more insights and actions on how you can get ready for love (again!)

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Sexy Over 50 Online dating tips for female boomers

Sexy Over 50...Top On-Line Dating Tips For Boomer Newbies

Tip #1- Get a NEW great photo...it is one of your best tools! My friend's Janet and Stephanie can look attractive or very average depending on the day, the activity and how much energy they put into their presentation. Your photo should reflect that you can "fix up" but still look like you! Remembering that Men Are Hunters and that means very visual...one of your keys to success online is to have a very flattering photo. This does not mean that you need to have a "Glamour Shot" that you could never in a million years replicate...it means having a photo that shows your best features...and looks like you look today! DO NOT use an old photo of you no matter how flattering. This is most men's major complaint...women using OLD photos of them YEARS younger and many pounds thinner. If you try this you will not get the desired results...men don't like to be duped...and neither do you!

Tip #2- Write your profile, re-write your profile, get help if needed on word-smithing. Some of us like to write, we're good at it and enjoy the process. Others of us hate to write as much as we hate public speaking especially when it's talking about ourselves and our amazing attributes! That is why I am suggesting that you get a friend or two (or Me!) to help you write your profile. Sometimes we don't really see what makes us special, adorable, lovable...even sexy! But a friend or even an ex-lover can easily tell you what are some of the most attractive attributes that you have to offer.

Don't be shy, this is the time to gently brag...if you are an award winning gourmet chef let him know that you LOVE to cook. Mention your favorite dishes and maybe even a fun cooking disaster...it makes you more real and could give you something to laugh about on your first phone call.

Hint: While men love to talk about sex putting too much sexual language in your profile may give the wrong message and attract "undesirables" versus the boyfriend you imagine!

Sexy Over 50 is the goal and dating can be fun...Tips #3-#10 coming in future posts!!! See ya soon...Melinda Lee, author, "Sexy Over 50"

 

 

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As we think about being Sexy Over 50 and wanting to date, the question that comes up for ME is...Am I really and truly "available?" I hear so many clients talk about attracting a man. Those are their exact words..."I want a man in my life!" Yet, when I watch their actions I can't see where they are leaving space for a relationship to occur. Because they don't currently have a romantic relationship they have filled their life so full that nothing or no one could possibly squeeze in. Sexy Over 50 female boomer dating tips 79073356 

I ask them...if you want a relationship how will you make time? Oh, that's easy they say..."When he comes along I will find time and space for him." Then they smile proudly as if God and The Universe will totally understand. Unfortunately it does not usually work that way...there is no vacuum for the man to fill.

One client told me she had finally met an amazing man and had a few great dates...but then it all seemed to just melt away. I asked for more details...she said they had gone out on a Saturday night then he called on Monday to see when he could see her next...as she rattled off all her activities...Work, the Kids, the Grandchildren (all good and important!) then, her women's support group, book club, volunteering at the Homeless Shelter, mani-pedi, walking the dog, shampooing her carpet...the list went on for a mile. "Mr. Right" accepted her busy life for a few weeks but eventually opted-out because he felt (I am guessing) too low of a priority on her "To Do" list. Apparently "Get a Man" ranked somewhere between walk the dog and shampoo the carpet!

Everyone wants to feel important, loved, needed...and a priority! So one of the first things I suggest women who want a relationship do is to "clear" before he enters. This can feel a bit uncomfortable at first but you can take that time to clean out your space...literally make room in your closets, in your garage, in your schedule for him. What may surprise you is your resistance to giving up some of you for him. So no matter what the outcome if being a Sexy Over Fifty Female Boomer who is interested in Dating...simply consider how available you really are for him! And, always remember, this is just one person's opinion....all the best, Melinda Lee, author, "Sexy Over 50"

 

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Not every Baby Boomer Female wants to be Sexy Over 50 but those of us who are Single and Dating have the thought of being attractive to the opposite Sex on our minds...at least occasionally. If you are considering getting a sexier vibe about you I personally think one of the first steps is to totally indulge yourself in a few hours of self-relection and what I am calling "Hedonism." When I think of hedonistic behavior a part of me shrinks and thinks..."Ohhh, that's bad behavior I could never do that"...but hedonism is about taking care of yourself in a bit of an indulgent way.

sexy over 50 dating hedonistic BATHphoto-19This past weekend I spent time in a lovely hideaway tucked up in the mountains surrounding Topanga Canyon very near Malibu, California. So gorgeous! A feast for the eyes and soul. And, on Saturday I stepped outside the cottage, it was warm and sunny and I was feeling a bit weary, but happy. I decided to take a bath...it's an outdoor fresh air tub, on the patio surrounded by vines so I had total privacy :-) What an amazing experience, totally hedonistic to be naked out in the open air, the sun streaming down on me, with the bath salts, rose petals and the bubbling balm doing their job!

Super yummy! 

When I got out of the tub about an hour later after reheating the water several times...I felt utterly luxurious and feminine. And, I noticed that taking the time to relax, pamper myself and having a bit of a hedonistic moment bathing in "public" was exciting and relaxing at the same time. 

So many of my Female Boomer aka Sexy Over Fifty friends (and me) find ourselves racing around so much that we literally can't feel anything and have no energy left over to be or feel sexy. This soothing bath after a nice walk (my cute TheraFits in the foreground) was exactly the Rx that my soul and femininity desperately needed to feel Sexy Over 50 again...at least that is what I would recommend as Step One to anti-aging, getting your mojo back and feeling Sexy Over Fifty...at any age!

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Sexy Over 50 fatty photoI have a boomer friend (let's call her Maggie) who has a weight problem and certainly does not think she is sexy over fifty. Maggie sometimes calls herself "Fatty" and then chuckles. I know that her laughter is really covering up her hurt and pain. Maggie is a great big  loving woman and I am guessing because of some pain (her husband left her years ago for a younger woman and she lost a child to Luekemia) she has had in the past she has eaten and drunk alcohol to make herself feel good. Personally, I believe she has used food and alcohol to numb her pain.

Just recently, Maggie told me she's interested in meeting a man and wants to start dating. I suggested she shed a few pounds and we came up with a plan, so now she is on a path to a slimmer version of herself. And, it is fun and insightful to see her going through her process of becoming a more svelte version of herself. Maggie is wisely adapting new routines so that her body is getting what it wants and needs which is self love. She has shifted from a version of self-hate to this new version of self loving. As time progresses it will be rewarding to see her results unfold, her go on her first date and ultimately get her mojo back..

Women tend to be more forgiving when it comes to being overweight. We see a person's energy, we see their love, we see a person's essence. But men are not so forgiving. Men want to see and be with attractive women. So like my boomer friend Maggie who affectionately calls herself "Fatty" it may be your turn, your time to investigate why you have put on the pounds. Is it possible that you may be afraid of feeling? Afraid to let someone get close? While we're at it we can look at lifestyle and the level of activity that you have in your life. Are the calories "in" more abundant than you need? 

I had a boyfriend a number of years ago, we were at a picnic where there were a majority of single over 50 women...and most were over-weight. We talked about this and almost had a fight regarding the topic. I thought it was very superficial that men would disregard a woman based on her weight...but he adamantly argued that it's just a truth. He took it even further and told me that many baby boomer woman make FOOD their new boyfriend...yikes...what a comment! 

If Sexy Over 50 is the goal and if we want to attract men...what is the healthiest relationship we can have with food? Personally,  I want to be friends with food it nourishes me, but, we've taken it too far when we let food literally and figuratively into our bed.

Food for thought...and, no sexy over 50 pun intended!

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I can't help it that being Sexy Over 50 is having a fit body. Yet, sometimes as we get older we can pack on extra poundage. If we look back to the way we looked as teenagers and young adults when we were in the "job" of attracting members of the opposite sex,  we usually see that our bodies were slimmer. Sometimes women over 50 get resentful of men in their age group dating women who are so much younger. We say to ourselves, "Why are these guys dating women who look like their daughters? Why are these men surrounding themselves with soooo much younger women?" I see this sooo much especially here in LA where it is the norm.
 
At one point in my life I thought that these guys were trying to make themselves feel younger by being with younger women. I felt that men dating women half their age had some sort of "mental disorder" and therefore could not be of interest to me.  I thought to myself with attitude..."Any man who is dating someone younger than his daughter certainly can't have his emotional act together." But then when I queried some of these men the response that I got was and still is... "I can't help it I am attracted to attractive younger bodies." They explain, "Men are visual creatures by nature. We see things and we want to have them, we are hunters. It is the way we are built." After doing some research, I realized that men are so different in their actual genetic makeup that I had to realize what makes them tick. What I was told is point on, "Men are hunters. Men need to be hunting to feel sexy and alive." Since thre beginning of time this has been true...men protect and provide...Sexy Over 50 History photo112706766
 
So if you want to attract and be "hunted" by men you need to look like what they are attracted to...probably via a slimmer version of you. And, whether we want to admit it or not, it truly is sexy to have a fit body. So I wondered what gets in the way of us having these firm slim bodies that we once had in our youth. Have we just gotten lazy? Are there hormonal and thyroid issues? Have we been gorging ourselves with fast food because we're too busy to think about a healthy option?
 
What has gotten in our way from being the healthiest and slimmest most sexy version of ourselves that we can be? Contemplate the topic deeply. Once you have figured out your block, (If you can't figure it out contact me directly) and say to yourself..."Now is the time to take hold and reclaim the body that I once had and I will have again!"
 
More on this topic in future posts...honestly, you make not like what I am saying here but it's true. So, if you are a boomer and want to be Sexy Over Fifty...please stay tuned!
 
 
 
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